Saturday, November 28, 2009

My Day

Mood: Photobucket Exhausted
Listening to: Radio 4
Reading: Corvus
Watching: No time to watch anything!
Playing: Mario & Yoshi
Eating: 'taters

It is not as epic as Jay's because I did not fall into a canal.

Raevyn went to town for work. I was booked to work 9 – 5.30.

Woke up with 15 minutes to get ready. I noticed that I did not have any money and the nearest cash machine is two miles away, and to reach it I’d have to walk through fields with bulls in them.

I resorted to borrowing £10 from auntie’s bag (which I already replaced)

I went to catch the 7.38 bus. Walked a mile to bus stop.

The bus stop fell down years ago, no one replaced it, if you want to catch the bus you have to hop up and down and dance for attention, and there is also no shelter from elements .

The bus never came.

I checked the timetable. Apparently the Saturday buses are not the same as the weekday buses.

But there was another one arriving at 8.03!

The bus never came. The wind was STRONG and the cold was COLD and fingers NUMB and shivering was abundant.

It started to rain. It did not stop raining.

Fortunately I had an umbrella!

I totally forgot the umbrella was in my bag.

Stood in rain. Got soaked.

Learned that light canvas trousers alternate between sticking to your thighs, then peeling off, then sticking again, when you instigate the walking motion.

The bus came. It had broken down. I'd waited an hour and a half.

I got a free ride!

That means crud all because I was going to buy a return at £6.50, and I’d still have to get back so would have to pay £5.40 later anyway.

I walked through town. Got soakeder. I was horribly worried because I was by now quite late, and had been unable to access them via phone to inform them of my lateness.

I got to my destination and was informed that I was in fact booked to work 10 – 4. Not 9 - 5.30. But it was a fun day, I dried off nicely.

Then I slammed my middle finger in a very fast moving door. It hurt and for some reason no one paid heed when I was hopping about waving my hand in the air and doing “GGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH”. Then I dropped a very heavy Nigella Lawson book on my index finger. Then I somehow got a gash on my ring finger.

My middle finger still hurts.

I had half an hour for lunch. This was not enough time to go grab a sammich. I missed breakfast and was hungry.

Then I was informed that my shift ended at 3, instead. No one had any idea why. Anyway, I was happy because I’d previously done very long days.

I walked back to the bus station. Got soakedededer.

I remembered I had an umbrella in my bag!

I had to put the umbrella (ella ella) away. Every time I used it I was lifted a few centimetres up from the ground.

I had to dive to restrain a rather large blind/partially sighted man with a stick. I had dashed across a road while the cars were far enough away, and since he saw other people crossing the road he assumed it was safe to cross. By the time I got across the cars were too close to be safe. Accident averted, no death today.

Bus arrived on time! I got a seat where I couldn’t see where I was going properly (i have to be able to see out the front window so I can determine the location of the invisible bus stop in the dark) So I just tried really hard to pay attention to the roads.

The driver didn’t have his big lights on so I completely missed the sign. Went past my stop.

Stopped the bus further on, elongating an already long uphill walk. LEAPED over a massive flood on side of the road.

Forgot to empty the large water bottle in my bag so as to reduce weight.

Went uphill. Uuuppphill.

Fortunately I remembered that there was a large splodge of horse poo on the road that I had to avoid!

I forgot and stepped in the horse poo

Wearing my only pair of expensive shoes

It was dark.

My shoes have porous soles, so I scrubbed them vigourously to make sure I don't smell loike a farm tomorrow

I got in!

My aunt phoned me and said “Would you like a lift? We’re just passing through town now.”


My clothes were so soaked that I’ve got to spin them and hang them above a fire.

I need the shirt I wore today for tomorrow and I don’t have access to a washing machine. So I handwashed them in the sink. I noticed a strange sheen on the water.

Turns out that the sink had invisible oily grease at the bottom of it, which I’d just stirred up and washed my clothes in.

I yoinked the simmering clothes out, cleaned the sink, then recleaned the clothes.

Am now sitting upstairs with a good old retro Errol Flynn Robin Hood film, and a cup of soup.

I burned my tongue on the soup.

It's just stopped raining.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009


70 words

Typing Test

sad achievement for the day..

Tuesday, November 03, 2009


Raevyn is watching Josh fry an egg.

Raevyn: "This is your brain on crack."

Josh: "You made a yolk!"

Raevyn: "You have to make a pun a day or you die don't you."

Josh: "Eggsactly. It's fowl."

Raevyn: "Do another one!"

Josh: "Nah it's allwhite."

Raevyn: "One day I gonna forbid you to pun for a whole 24 hours."

Josh: "That's shellfish!"

Raevyn: "Oh my god.."

Josh: "Only bad thing about making puns is that you don't get laid."

Raevyn: *leaves*